Seeing light in the darkness

A lot of us go through, things from our childhood, employment, encounters with peoples friendship and how we are treated by people, by friendships and relationships and sometimes that is a positive impact and sometimes it is a possibility to have a positive impact like something like my childhood did for me, of having a zeal that’s unreal to make the change I want to happen in the world. But a lot of times sadly we are not that lucky, sometimes we have something so traumatic happen to us that it takes us years to recover. Today I am going to talk about how we are actually can recover from that or help people to come out from the side of darkness.

During my life, I have encountered 3 people that were the survivors of rape, and i am mentioning this because obviously its absolutely devastating for survivors to deal with but often or not when your the family member or friend of survivor you don’t know what to do because all you do makes things worse, well sadly I am not talking in theory that happened to 3 times where i had to help people and its difficult to even contemplate something that horrific happening to any person but when its someone you know that pain is that much more unbearable and no one autistic or not knows how to truly support someone, who is a survivor of that but since the autism league one of our remits is to help autistic people I will give it a shot because it is a topic that sadly needs to be talked about . Now full disclosure, I am lucky I haven’t had to go through that, but to many people, too many girls, I have seen who have and what happens its heartbreaking, Someone, a friend I know a wonderful girl is in a relationship that is toxic beyond belief, and I made the mistake that a lot of people in my position and are autistic make, be to direct and now the support I am able to provide my friend is limited. Being direct and hot hiding what we think can be the enemy in this situation, to give your friend or family member the help they need. Now what needs to be mentioned is how dangerous it can be a girl in this day an age, and usually, I try to avoid showing my emotions in this advice articles, but this makes me beyond angry and fills me with rage. I just worry about my friends a lot. Last night I was on the line with a friend of mine, to make sure she got home safe late at night for about an hour cause I was that worried. We have an instinct to want fix to want help, but the truth is we cant we have to be there during those dark moments that our loved will undoubtedly have and its not fair, but that’s the only way to be where we can’t always fix we can’t always help but what we can do is be there for them to deal with that pain, and as autistic people often or not we look for solution truthfully there is none, and the only solution we can find is how to help someone carry the load, and slowly go to get help. If anyone needs some support pls do get in contact with us, our contact details are available. our team is very accessible through the facebook page. We can try to provide an ear to listen and try to our best to advise or we can try to signpost.

Bullying and abuse can take the fact of many different levels whether it’s being verbal abuse, physical and can happen during all ages through primary school even to uni, and we need to be able to talk about it especially us autistic people, as well as we, have a dangerous path, on creating associations with how things are supposed to be and that is dangerous, and potentially lethally . If we grow up, seeing that it was not okay to talk about our emotions, to talk about how we are, and if we get told that horrible treatment is normal that’s what we believe healthy things can be ,and the recovery from that is beyond difficult beyond hell and but it can be done , but the first thing we need to know to be able to know that to be aware of the patterns you are getting through and be aware of your habits and rituals cause they can dictate what mental state you get into . and please do watch that. You also have to look out for what is abuse towards you whether it’s making you doubt yourself and who you really are, whether what a person is saying or doing is making you bout your interest or who you are, or if your in a relationship and they are telling you who to see or what to do . Be a watchful eye and look after yourself and as always the league is here for you

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